When I originally created this blog, I wanted it to be about “the average college girl.” Yet during summer break it is relatively difficult to relate my personal summer experiences to those of most girls my age. However, there is one part of my life that is shared by college girls everywhere: the inevitable college boy .
You cannot talk about the “average college girl” without mentioning the ever-present boy(s) that surround her world. For some, it is that cute boy across the hall who doesn’t even know your name. For others, it is the older guy in your English class who is now your sophisticated college boyfriend. And then there’s that last category – the long distance boyfriends.
Next week, I am going to Europe for the first time (!!!) and I will definitely write a post or two about my travels. However, my trip isn’t a family vacation to Paris nor is it a girls’ trip to Barcelona. I’m going to Norway. Random? Not particularly.
Before you get really confused next week when you see that I am in Norway not to travel, but to visit my Norwegian boyfriend, I’ll fill you in on the story. During the first day of my junior year of high school – three years ago – my boring small Catholic school of 180 students was given some excitement: a Norwegian exchange student. That’s Knut. Long story short, we started dating near January and said goodbye when he left in June. That was it.
Except of course you now know that wasn’t really the end. A year later, last summer, Knut came back to visit his host family and see some friends. And me? Well, I somehow ended up in a long distance relationship with someone who lives in Norway.
Most people definitely think I am insane. Or just weird. But really, if you can do it the right way, a long distance boyfriend is not so bad. Think about the girl who is always with her boyfriend. The one who never comes to dinner outings and rarely stays in for a girls’ night. You love her, but she’ll never be a true part of the group because she’s always off with John Doe.
Me? I’m the ultimate girls’ girl. I am always up for a night out (or a night in) and I never really care if guys are there or not. I love being with the girls, and going out isn’t about looking for a boy. This past year I was able to make everlasting friendships because my sole social focus was on girls. Having a long distance boyfriend makes it so that I am fully invested in my relationships with all of my girlfriends.
Now, you’re probably wondering about the boyfriend. What’s the point of dating someone who you never see? Well, I see him for a full week every 3 months and am spending the entire month of July with him. We call/skype at least 4 days per week, text as much as we can, and I still talk to him more than I talk to anyone else. Yeah, he lives in Norway. But if he went to school in New York I would probably just see him once a month for a weekend – that’s no more time than the full week every three months.
College is such a fun time for everyone, but so many girls waste so much time worrying about insignificant college guys. I’m not saying that having a boyfriend who goes to your school or dating around is a bad idea, of course it isn’t. I would definitely do anything to have Knut at Vanderbilt with me. But he isn’t and so I have found a way to make it work.
My relationship is not conventional and it’s not easy to understand, but it allows me to maximize my college experience and focus on myself in a way that I could not if Knut were always nearby. He’s been my best friend for three years, and the way our relationship works has given us both the opportunity to be much more independent than most couples. One day, we will hopefully live in the same city. But for now, I’m okay with how it is. We’re young and our lives should still be about ourselves, not each other. No eighteen-year-old should be fully dependent on anyone at this point in her life.
So, I guess in some ways I’m not the average college girl. But hey, at least I have a fun fact about myself that never fails to spark conversation.
See you all next Tuesday from Oslo, Norway!